Ungagables, A Few Rants, & Some Other Stuff

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THE UNGAGABLES

The great news for us gag snobs is that a quick look at the careers of most cute actresses reveals that, statistically, if they're in the business long enough, they likely will receive a gag at some point sooner or later. Indeed, an attractive actress with a long and healthy career who never gets gagged is actually an aberration. If you remove those ladies who's choice of roles all but eliminates any real opportunity (Such as Meryl Streep, who basically does nothing but films with virtually no chance of a scene, like Silkwood and Sophie's Choice) you get an even higher percentage.

Therefore, while a Teri Hatcher type career, loaded with gag scenes from multiple sources, is sadly quite rare, thankfully, so to is a uber-babe like The Hew (Jennifer Love Hewitt) completely avoiding anything even remotely resembling a gag.  Jen's had a long career both in the kind of films that have a decent statistical probability  of DiD scenes as well as a long running TV series that should have been conducive to a gag scene, yet she's been, well... ungagable.

So, all you future actresses, just know this: We gag snobs may get you a little too early (Kaley Cuoco) and we might get you a little too late (Elizabeth Taylor), but most of the time, we will get you, my pretties.

Insert diabolical laugh here.

NBA Fines Players For Saying "Faggot"

Recently the NBA fined Kobe Bryant 100 grand for ripping an official and using the word "faggot". A couple of days ago they nailed another player 50 grand for blasting some asshole in the stands with the same insult. If the NBA wants to fine players and coaches for using profanity on the court, I have no problem with that as many kids are usually in the stands and can hear that stuff. But the league has no issue with you screaming fuck bombs to your hearts content. Whisper the word "faggot" though, and they nail you.

I have a problem with that. Why is one insult so much worse than another? Because it's offensive? Pardon me, but isn't that the freakin' point of an insult, to be offensive? What if a white player is called a "cracker" or "honkie" by a black player? Will they get fined? Not likely. The N-word? Well, I could argue that's the exception that makes the rule, but we know black players can fire that one off at will with no repercussions. 

Supposedly, this was so bad because some basketball front office guy "came out" last week. So? And? More to the point, why do we even need to know that at all? Personally? I don't hate gays. I don't love gays. I... DON'T... CARE.

Live and let live is my moto, but if you try to force something on me, (You MUST love all things gay!) I'm going to react like I did when the media tried to "make" us love soccer or when Carter tried to shove the metric system on us. I'm going to revolt.

My issues with gays are their insistence on claiming special status as some put upon minority group as well as shoving their "gayness" in our faces and virtually demanding we like it.

Not going to happen.



Smoking Ban in NYC Parks Takes Effect 

Let me clear: I don't smoke. Never have, never will. I think it's a disgusting, nasty, invasive habit and you have to be a real moron to be a puffer. It doesn't make you look "cool" it makes you look like an idiot.   

That said, it just rubs my libertarian side the wrong way when smoking is banned outside in an area where people are free to come and go as they like. But even much worse, to me, are the bans on bars and restaurants allowing smoking. This one really goes against my grain because we're talking about a privately owned business. The very idea of the government telling me what I can do inside my business just bothers me to no end.  

All you democrats/liberals/socialists out there who like the government "solving" your problems, this is the kind of thing you get. Slippery slope people.



Poll Results: Bin Laden's Death

The results were basically on point with what I thought they would be, other than the three who felt Bin Laden should have gotten his day in court. My opinion on that is, (a) If he wanted his day that badly, he should have surrendered a long time ago, and (b) When you come out on video saying all of 9-11 was your plan and that you were so happy at how well it worked, it makes a trail a moot point. 



  
Philly Police Harass, Threaten to Shoot Man Legally Carrying Gun

One of the things I hear said by law enforcement (Real and actors) on TV and in the movies a lot is this line in one form or the other: 

"Well, at least we've taken another gun/some more guns off the streets."

What utter, completely silly, nonsensical horse shit.

I really could care less how many guns are "off the streets". What I do care about is, how many people who use guns/knives/bats/hammers/whatever to commit crimes are "off the streets". 

Remove the criminals. Leave our guns alone.

Two Asian Flicks Produce Scenes

I recently came across these two films with full treatment scenes.

Kinatay (The Execution of P) 2009

Missing 44 2010

As a film, Kinatay, made in the Philippines, is mostly flat and tedious, at least for awhile, Then the girl is snatched and things pick up from there a bit as she's bound and tape-gagged with stuffing for a trip with some bad guys to a house away from the main city. After that, things definitely do not go well for the lady, so be warned. Shot with hand-held cameras. I usually like horror/action flicks but this one seemed utterly useless to me. Other than the bondage, of course, but even that I didn't care for much as she's thumped pretty good in the face before they bind her. Fairly long scenes though.

Missing 44 is a Japanese Pinku flick about four teenage girls who are abducted, and tortured. Lots of restraints, a couple of gag scenes. 

I can handle some simple clipping but the scenes in these flicks are too spread out for me. What I did instead was to upload the films to Megaupload. I used HJSplit to break Kinatay into multiple parts.If you've never used it, HJSplit is a stupid-simple little freeware program that's 100% virus free.

Maybe someone with more skill than I can take a shot at clipping.

KINATAY Part 1

KINATAY Part 2

MISSING 44  

Enjoy.

Obama Does The Right Thing For The Wrong Reasons

First, I want to be completely, 100% crystal about this: I have absolutely no issues, problems, or moral dilemmas whatsoever about U.S. Forces waxing Bin Laden, whether he was armed, unarmed, on his knees begging for mercy, or making whoopee with one of his child brides.

That, however, according to Obama and his ACLU-lovin' sidekick Eric Holder, was not the proper way America was supposed to deal with terrorists.
  
Let’s try Terrorists in civilian court…Eric Holder’s idiocy Redux
  
Eric Holder: Terrorists and Osama Bin Laden Have Same Rights As Charles

Oops.

Nope, we were supposed to capture them alive, if at all possible, read them their rights like any other "normal" criminal, and give them their day in an American civilian court of law.


So, what happened? More to the point, where is the outrage and snide remarks from the left wing (An oxymoron, They're virtually all liberals) media?

Taking the second point first, unless Obama does something really crazy, like heaven forbid, stop an abortion, the media won't say a single bad thing about him, so forget that. It ain't happening. In their eyes, this guy is the closest thing they'll ever see to a living, breathing (Non-Christian, of course) Jesus. 

Seems clear now that Bin laden wasn't armed, so the idea he couldn't be taken alive is lame. Even if he was, I think a team of SEALs could still take this crud alive if required.

But Obama didn't want that. With gas prices sky-rocketing, with unemployment holding at almost 9%, with his stimulus package nonsense hijinks imploding, he needed a win. And not a liberal kind of win, a middle class America, kind of win.

It's been done before you know. In an act so blatantly obvious everyone but a democrat saw right through it, Slick Willie (Clinton) bombed Iraq at the exact same time he was getting impeached. 

I am not so naive as to believe that no Republican president has ever used the power of his office to deflect bad press away from him, but only liberals tend to use our military for such actions. 

Go ahead and smoke Bin Laden boys. We'll read the next terrorist guy his rights. 

Oh, those wacky libs and their vacillating morals.  


It would make me laugh if wasn't so sad, but in reality, the laugh is all on us.

This `n That For May, 2011

Just a few things here:

The Heels Have It.

In a vote that shocked, well, no one, it seems dastardly villains prefer their restrained damsels in heels by a overwhelming margin. Stilettos dominated 2nd place winner "bare feet" (51% to 21%). 3rd place was the upset, as it went to "other", beating out "socks" by a solid percentage. (11% to 5%). "Socks" in fact, finished in last place, losing out to even "don't care" (9%), meaning that less than one in ten of us could care less how our damsel's feet are attired. That number kind of surprised me.  

The real shocker though, was "other". To be honest, I included "other" as real afterthought. I'm just amazed it got as many votes as it did. I'm not even sure what it means exactly. Sneakers? Other than that, I can't fathom what "other" could pertain to. If anyone voted "other" and meant something besides sneakers, please respond and let me know. Just curious here.

ABK IV

When I finish a story chapter, even though I do spell check and all of that, there are invariably mistakes. What I should do is put the finished product aside and let it sit undisturbed for a few days, then go back and read through it again. I always catch a lot of stuff that way, but I'm usually so behind getting it out, I just post it and go.

Anyway, I went back and re-read the chapter, and corrected a lot of things. Nothing major, nothing that will alter the story, but if you want, the link now goes to the fixed version.

Interesting tidbit, chapter one, which even I thought was a bit lacking in damsel activity, has been downloaded almost twice as much as chapter two, which is loaded with DiD action. I find that... odd.

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Just to be clear, I only post update notices at BP or elsewhere when I add new DiD related material. If it's of a political nature or something else, I just post it with no notices.


Question About Story Format...

Is everyone OK with my stories being posted in PDF format? I can also do XML, which is pretty much the same thing, only Microsoft's "version" of it. Why does MS feel the need to always create their own proprietary formats for everything? I might understand if they were usually better or more popular, but with  rare exceptions, the exact opposite is true.

If you use Adobe Reader, congratulations, you have one of the world's most bloated and needlessly pain-in-the-ass constantly updating PDF readers. I highly recommend uninstalling Adobe Reader and downloading/installing Foxit Reader.  It's freeware like AR, does everything AR does at a fraction of the size and it's MUCH less intrusive. It's under 8mb's compared to AR, which is at least 41mb. Also, Foxit updates are much less often, and a fraction of the size once again. Foxit also has plugins for IE and Firefox. It's so superior, it's not even funny. 


ENDURE

Endure is a great DiD film isn't it? I mean, hard to pick on a movie that has it's heroine literally bound and gagged for the entire film. Not only that, but in a real change from recent horror fare, (Spoiler Alert!) our damsel didn't get hacked up into a bloody mess, or have the living shit beaten out of her, or killed off at the end. Nice. She was kidnapped, placed out of the way bound and fairly tightly gagged, and rescued alive and relatively unharmed at the end. 

That's how it's supposed to happen, Hollywood people! Live it. Learn it. 

Nitpicks: I have a couple. That cleave-gag, while decently tight, literally kept Clare Kramer almost totally silent. That's ridiculous, and looked that way on screen. Would've been a much better scene with some realistic mmph'ing going on. 

Watched Endure this past weekend with my girlfriend (Who knows my ummm... leanings... in this area) and another couple who don't. When the part came up where the hunting dog finds her, my GF commented to the group about how Clare was unable to make any real sounds thru that gag. The other girl (Decently cute, but laughs really freakin' loud! Loudest laugh I have ever heard, man or woman.) agreed and said that she would be screaming her head off, gag or no gag. Her boyfriend said the thing to use was tape. I just sat there fighting the urge to go get some duct tape and play "Bondage Mythbusters". Let's test that theory, shall we?   

My GF laughed at me. I made her "pay" for my discomfort later on, believe me.

Second nitpick: Wouldn't it have been great to have Clare doing a voice-over during her captivity? I think that would have been awesome, myself. 

DiD MOVIE ALERT - Red, White And Blue (2010)

Red, White And Blue (2010) is sort of a thriller with some horror overtones. It's nasty, bleak, and mean, and not in a good way.

It's one redeeming quality is that it features not one, not two, but three bound and gagged damsels. That's the good news. Bad news is, they are not treated kindly, and one of them is quite young, around 12-14, I'm guessing.

You can find it at several torrent sites for quick download.

Someone with better clipping skills than I will need to handle that aspect of it.

ACLU Ploy Would Force Hospitals to Perform Abortions - HUMAN EVENTS

ACLU Ploy Would Force Hospitals to Perform Abortions - HUMAN EVENTS

Yet another reason I despise the ACLU.