Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Gun Control

"I love guns ,fuckin love them...",

I don't love them or hate them. IMO, they're simply a tool, like a shovel or wrench.


"... shoot each other en masse the way you americans do..."

The problem with that remark is that if exclude people defending themselves from crime and poor urban areas, the number falls to near nothing. Those same poor urban areas, BTW, are almost always areas where they have the strictest gun-control. ala Washington DC.

I live in an area where I can safely say just about everyone owns at least one, and in most cases, numerous firearms, with many using concealed carry. And yes, I fall into that category. Our violent crime rate is virtually nil.


"My problem is with such a huge population you are obviously gonna have a few whackos"

"Whackos" will get guns no matter what the laws are. Even more reason us non-whackos need to have the ability to defend ourselves.


"you get pissed of disturbed people shooting up the post office the high school,Mcdonalds etc."


And what do all those places have in common? That's right, it's against the law to have/carry firearms, and so what happens is all the law-abiding citizens are unarmed while the kook gets to pick and choose targets at will like shooting ducks in a barrel.

Did it ever cross your mind that whackos specifically target these places because they're gun-free zones, therefore basically undefended? Notice they never, ever, target a gun club? A firing range? A cop bar?

They might be crazy, but they ain't stupid. The only stupid people are the gun-control advocates who actually believe banning firearms would keep bad guys from getting firearms.


"The conservative argument ,that if these whackos have the guns ,we should have them too for protection just doesn't hold water ,it only puts more guns out there ,and adds fuel to the fire ."

Our argument "holds water" because it's logical to a point that cannot be disputed. I would not be for gun-control even if it worked. Since it's a proven abject failure, I'll keep my weapons thank you.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

GAG TEASERS

Series that should generate plenty of gag-scenes... but don't.

Just what is a gag-teaser? That's a series, which, due to type, normal plot-lines, and stars, co-stars, and guest-stars, should consistently produce good gag scenes, but inexplicably don't.

Over the years, there have been a number of shows that fall into this dubious category, but one series stands above (Below?) all others:



#1, and being first on this list means you really, truly, stink. How bad is SMALLVILLE when it comes to not gagging females?

Let's start with the premise and plot-lines. This is a series about Clark before he became Superman, or hell, even Superboy. Let that sink in: S-U-P-E-R-M-A-N.

Let's put aside the feature films, because, quite honestly, not seeing Margot "Ugliest Lois By Far Ever" Kidder and Kate "I used to be hot but now I'm an ABAC poster child " Bosworth in gags doesn't make me weep at all.

So on to the series and serials: 3 series, two serials. Number of gag scenes: Too many to list. More than I can count with both hands and feet. Quality? You kiddin' me? Teri Hatcher in all her pre-ABAC glory...



Including one of the great scenes of all time...

video


... and that's leaving out my choice as, if not the sexiest Lois ever, certainly in the top two, Phyllis Coates.





It's also doesn't include the various toon series that produced some nice scenes themselves:




SMALLVILLE? Now in it's 8th season, we have a grand total of... two. Three, I suppose if we count Chloe's "dental mouth spreader" and I don't, because I don't like `em and it's my article. (But feel free to count it if you choose.) I also don't count Lois' "one blurred frame" gag scene, if you even want to call it that. Even if one does count those others, my point remains because IMO, quality counts far, far, more than quantity.

Seven plus seasons, 22 episodes per year, and just two/three countable, forget good, gag scenes. None of which are particularly memorable, and only one/two with a series regular, Allison "Chloe" Mack:



It's not like they didn't have sufficient babes around to gag either. This series has had some major-league muffins on it:

























Do you realize how difficult pulling that off is in a Superman series? One with action/adventure plot-lines? (Albeit with more than enough "Dawson's Creek" teen angst)

Damn near impossible, I'd say, at least so far as pure chance goes. I mean, TV writers aren't exactly the most inventive in the world. Even those who are at the tip-top when it comes to that skill (Buffy, Moonlighting, etc...) still manage to get at least a few of their female leads gagged once in a while.

I know, I know. You're thinking, "Vince, you're goofy. No way this is some plot. No way they're avoiding gags on purpose." I would tend to agree. Logic says so, but the odds... the odds say say otherwise.

Even some of the all-time gag-tease series produced more. Charlies Angels? At least 3 in 6 seasons. Wild Wild West? 2 for sure, but in only 4 seasons, and this show had no female leads.

So, am I crazy? Could this possibly be on purpose, or just an incredible coincidence? I have to lean on choice "A", because to me, all the evidence points that way, but give me your input. Also, any other series make your top gag-tease lists?