Battle Of The Babes: Selena vs Miley vs Hayden

As I post this, my poll on Hottest Babe ends today, and I thought it would be fun to break it down and rank them in individual categories. I'm leaving Demi Lovato out because, as I expected, she's getting killed by the other three, who are basically neck and neck.

When a honey muffin like Demi gets trounced, you know the competition is strong as hell. I plan to give points for each spot (1 for first, 2 for second, etc...). In the end, the lowest point total should be the winner of the hottest babe competition.

Prettiest Face

1. Selena 2. Hayden 3. Miley

All of these ladies are gorgeous, but Selena takes the top spot because of those sensuous lips and overall beauty. Hayden's not far behind. Check her out in the film Bring It On: All Or Nothing (2006). She is awesome looking. Stunning. Miley used to have an issue with overexposed gums at times. She's grown out of that, but not quite enough to overtake the others.


Best Breasts

1. Miley 2. Hayden 3. Selena

None of these ladies is close to sporting Lindsey Lohan(Pre-skank)/Scarlett Johansson rackage, but in a battle of the B-cups (Miley might be a C-cup by now, but it's close), I believe Miley wins a tight one. Hayden definitely has some perky, fine little hooters. At some point in the future, Selena may well have the best set of all, but here and now, I don't think she's quite as filled out as she will be eventually.


Best Butt

1. Hayden 2. Miley 3. Selena

All of these ladies have outstandingly fine cabooses, but Hayden wins this one hands... errr... ass down. She simply has a perfect, tight tushie. Again, check her out in her Bring It On flick in those tiny little shorts. Arrrooouuuu! Woof! Woof!


Best Legs

1. Miley 2. Selena 3. Hayden

Miley has long been underrated in the gams department. The girl has some damn fine sticks, that cannot be denied. Selena takes second by a hair over Hayden, even though she's still hurt in this category by that "skinny" issue. Hayden loses a couple of needed points here because of her short stature.


Best Overall Body

1. Miley 2. Hayden 3. Selena

Both Miley and Hayden lose points because of gawddamn MF'ing tats, but they're relatively obscure at this point. Not long ago, Hayden would have won this one hands down, but it ain't 2006 anymore and that picture of Miley with the curves and abs pushed her over the top by a smidgen. Once again, Selena can't quite crack the top two just yet. Give it another year or three and she might dominate this competition.

Point totals:

Selena -    12 points
Hayden -   10 points
Miley -        8 points


And the winner is... Miley Cyrus




Wow. That's a surprise. As God is my witness, when I did this I had absolutely no idea who would win until I added up the points. I simply worked up the categories and started voting with my best thoughts on who ranked where in each individual test.

I'd like to hear everyone's honest thoughts and opinions.

I like this so much I'm going pull a first and post this in my personal forum area over at DVF as well.

Rango Clip - For Those Who Like Gagged Reptiles

Gagged female? Yup, but it's still a lizard...

I'm sorry, I just can't get excited about the scene in Rango.

It's not that I hate animated scenes. I don't... not at all. I like those that feature "real" females, but I mean, come on people. This is a lizard.

Please take a DEEP breath Isla...

And even a lizard voiced by a sweet muffin like Isla Fisher is still a freakin' lizard for gosh sakes. And it's not even some reptile built like Jessica Rabbit. It's a bony-ass, skinny female lizard in a school marm's dress.

Meh.


The only reason I bothered clipping this at all is because (a) No one else seems to have gotten around to it yet, and (b) It was there.

Lost in the 50's tonight...

A word about this clip. The copy I had was a very high quality version. That's good. Unfortunately, it was a little too high quality. I found a flaw in MediaCope's cutting program in that it doesn't like 6-channel audio at all. That's bad, so I had to convert the entire flick to a different format with 2-channel sound in order to clip it. Unfortunately, (That word's coming up a lot in this article, huh? That's uh... unfortunate. Heh.) the version I converted the film to was a tad lower in quality than I intended. Long story, but I had to use my laptop to convert it with, and it took a loooong time with it's older dual core processor, rather than my i7 quad core screamer. So long, in fact, that for a scene I really don't care about anyway, I simply refuse to go through the process again.

So anyway, here's the clip. I hope it's not too crappy, but I'm sure Sudden Sam will have a uncompressed 1080P version out soon enough.

Download Rango clip HERE.

Rants, Raves, & Other Stuff For July, 2011

So the other night I was watching the TV Show, Rookie Blue. I watch it for two reasons. One, Missy Peregrym and Charlotte Sullivan are quite the yummy pair, and two, I carry on in the hope that Missy will have a chance at a much longer version of her previous (And only, up to this point) gag scene. 

Hey! Are you checking out my rack?

Of course, I'd love to see Charlotte get her first, as she's still a gag-virgin.  Tell you what, if she keeps looking as good as she does here, I might just have to bump her up over Missy on my want list.

 

They look even better when I do this!

Here, check out my great cleavage!

But I have to tell you, this is one tough show to take. It's can be so ludicrous at times, and more than a little too PC for my tastes. The latest idiocy occurred in the last show, when Missy's character, who's a cop of course, is home alone when she hears a noise outside. She locates her sidearm (Smart) which is in one of those pointless gun lock boxes and unloaded.(Beyond stupid). 

This is an absurd scenario. Meaning, the lock box. In this case, our girl heard the noise outside, while the lights were on, and she was wide awake. So, she had no problem locating the box, then unlocking it, and then loading a magazine. Also, she had plenty of time to do all of this. 

But what if it's in the dead of night, pitch dark, and she was awakened by the sound of a 300 pound, axe-welding sex maniac serial killer busting in?  Moreover, he was already halfway down the hall to her bedroom? Is there any chance anyone could wake up, startled, figure out what was happening, locate the lock box, unlock it, and load the weapon, all before Mr. rapist-murderer gets hold of your sweet ass?  

Not a chance in hell, and suddenly you realize the most useless device in the world is an unloaded gun you can't get to in time. But by then, it's far too late, isn't it? Congratulations, you've just been raped and murdered, but the good news is, all the nutty gun control advocates out there salute you. 


So that alone is stupid enough, but here's the kicker. She's a cop. Not some soccer mom with a bunch of kids at home, or some little old lady almost as scared of the gun as she would be of an attacker. She is (supposedly) a trained police officer. And this person keeps her sidearm in a locked box????? As I stated before, I know a lot of law enforcement personnel, personally, professionally, and in a few other online forums I frequent, and so I posed the question to a number of them. Would any cop really do that? 

The answer I got was about what I expected; namely, a lot of derisive laughter at the ludicrous question. The wording was something like "Not no, but hell no", or "No way would any cop lock his or her weapon up like that at home". 

But of course, this is network television, or liberal land as I like to call it, where common sense goes out the window in favor of being politically correct. 


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Rant #2

Did you know the American women's soccer team won a "stunning" last second victory the other day? You didn't? Neither did I. In fact, I didn't even know they had played. But according to ESPN on their various daily sports shows (PTI, Mike & Mike, Rome, 1st & Ten, etc...), over and over, to the point of nauseating overkill, the "entire nation" was "captivated" by this "incredible" win. Well, I wasn't exactly "captivated". More like completely ambivalent. I mean, I always want American's to win at everything, but soccer, and even more so, women's soccer, is so far down on my list of sports I care about that it has to look up to see tiddlywinks.

But, was that just me? Was everyone else talking about this game? Once again, I ran my informal poll, asking various people, both women and men. About 20 total, give or take a few. Of all those people, only one had even heard about the game, and they hated soccer more than I did. 


I suspect it only "captivated" those guys over at ESPN, and maybe some others in New York and LA, but in flyover country, it barely registered. I see this as just another lame attempt to cram soccer down the throats of Americans. Why some people so desperately want America to love soccer is beyond me. I suppose it's because the rest of the world loves it, and so we should as well. Silly nonsense.


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Rant #3

Over at Brian's Page, there's been a rash of moronic posts asking for information on the most inane of situational DiD scenes:

"Does anyone know of any scenes that have where a DiD is gagged but has stinky bad breath? 

"Can anyone name some DiD scenes where the girl's fingernails are cut really short?"

"Are there are any DiD scenes where the female has one boob that's larger then the other? (One breast smaller than the other will work too)"    

These are made up, but trust me when I say they're not any more asinine than the real ones posted there. 

This nonsense has always gone on, but before it was always thankfully rare. Recently however, there's been a spate of halfwit posts like this.  


Why not simply ignore it? I don't know. Some things just bug you, like people who make a turn without giving a signal. Might not effect me at all, but it still gives me the urge to whack them with a large stick at times.

I call on Brian to put a stop to this idiocy. Lord knows he's always calling this or that "off topic", and these kinds of daffy, puerile posts have no value at all. 

Shouldn't that be the very essence of "off topic"?


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Rant #4

So I see where some Latino major league baseball players want to get together and boycott over Arizona's new Immigration Law. Well, they certainly have the right to do so, but my question would be why? I have read the entire law (Which is only a few pages. Not a big deal) and it seems very logical and easy to me. In fact, I would go a step or two past it, but all this law really does is require the local cops to obey the laws already on the books. And, if they detain anyone for another *legal* reason, to check with the feds to see if that person is here legally.

In other words, this "new" law will have absolutely no effect on you unless you are here illegally.

But you sure wouldn't know that by listening or reading the MSM. Good Lord no. According to them, this law is one small step above Nazism. Thankfully, there are some out there with enough common sense to say what it really means. You can read that here and here.

Anyway, since I assume all these MLB Latino's are here legally, I have to wonder, are they basically advocating illegal immigration? They won't ever say that, of course. They'll couch it as some form of protecting the rights of legal immigrants, but it would seem so.


On ESPN's 1st and 10 the other day, Skip Bayless and Rob Parker debated the law. Now, I have considered Bayless a spineless prick ever since he supposedly "outed" Troy Aikman as gay, a "fact" I'm sure all his past girlfriends, his wife of many years, and his three kids found rather curious, to say the least. But, that said, I have to admit the man comes up with a good one every now and then. His latest good one was to stand up for the Arizona law, which shocked me, as I fully expected the ESPN "debate" to be between someone utterly despising the law with a passion, and someone kind of on the fence, but basically not liking it.

Rob Parker, who is black, said that Skip could never understand, because he wasn't black, and therefore had never been stopped for no reason other than "driving while black".


My response to that is this: Despite being a smaller percentage of the population than whites, blacks and Hispanics commit a far higher percentage of violent crime than whites. That is simply a fact that every study supports, though they vary on the exact numbers.

It would stand to reason then, that those groups would be the first looked at when such a crime occurs or when looking to prevent such crimes from taking place. Is that racial profiling? Yes, but that's also the most logical way to go about it, just as "profiling" Arab-looking males is the best way to prevent another 9-11, because that's exactly who's been behind all these attacks. When there's an unidentified serial killer running around, I don't see any white males bitching about being "racially profiled". (Nor, by the way, do I see or hear any liberals or minority group leaders complaining about whites being profiled either.)

Many minorities want it both ways. They want their ethnicity acknowledged when it's advantageous for them, and they demand it be ignored when it might be any type of a burden.

Too bad, too sad. Can't have it both ways.

So my advice to Rob is, work on getting black people as a group to openly and aggressively campaign to stop crime in your ethnic group. Stop glamorizing gang bangers and thugs.

If that occurs and suddenly it's whites committing the majority of violent crime, the cops won't stop you. They'll be stopping me instead.   

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Poll Stuff

I've been intrigued by the voting on my latest poll. It started off as I would have predicted, with Hayden Panettiere taking a big early lead, but quickly enough, Miley and Selena pulled up right there with her, and, as I write this, Selena has actually taken the lead.

That's really about the way I'm thinking right now, with the three girls neck and neck, basically. A year ago, I would have taken Hayden hands down in a split second, but recently, Selena has really moved up my list. And that photo I posted of Miley from that film she has coming out, with her taut abs, has me rethinking my ranking of her as well. Woof!

For me, I'd say it's a horse race and the winner depends on my mood that particular day.

Thus endeth my rants and thoughts of this day.

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New Clip & Film Review: CRAZY LIPS (2000)

Oh no! He's going to rape me! Stop! Stop!

When it comes to Asian Category III classics, no one produced these seedy, violent, sexploitative flicks better or more often than Hong Kong did from the early 80's on through about 1997. But that doesn't mean others didn't put in a good effort now and then, nor does it mean the genre ran out after `97.

Oh no! He is definitely raping me! Help! Stop!

Even today, you will run across a good Cat III movie occasionally, from all over Asia, but the one I'm writing about today comes from Japan. The Japanese are certainly no strangers to horror films, but theirs tend to be about nasty, long haired, evil ghost girls and the like.

Oh no! He's... wait, why are my nipples aroused?

But, in 2000, they made a true, died-in-the-wool Cat III flick called Crazy Lips (Hakkyousuru kuchibiru). I have no idea what the title means or pertains to. Make no mistake, this film is crazy, but the "lips" part baffles me. May well be some sort of translation confusion.

Oh no, no don't stop raping me... don't stop... !

Anyway, this is one truly bizarre film. While it has many of the standard Cat III staples (Bloody murders, headless ghosts, rapes, strangely placed humor, sexy nude females, etc...) it also has several off-the-wall subplots, as well as the lead breaking into song (A Cat III first that I'm aware of), brother and sister incest, a kind of sci-fi/religion thing, intense martial arts fighting by people who should have no skills in that area, and a number of insanely oddball (Even for a Japanese flick) characters. 

With all that, it adds up to a very entertaining 3/4 of a movie. Unfortunately, in the 4th quarter, the makers had to somehow tie all the mayhem and subplots together, and that's where the film goes off track. Rating this movie, I say the first three quarters get's an "A". The last quarter get's a "D".  

Overall score: "B". Recommended.



In this DiD clip, there are these two psychics who are helping the main lead (Hitomi Miwa) to locate her brother and some missing girls. Hitomi's sister, a very cute babe named "Hijiri Natsukawa" (This is her only film listed at IMDB) is used by the family and the psychics as a means to start some kind of ceremony. 

How do they start it? By raping the girl, naturally. She's held down by mom while the psychic's assistant rapes her. They gag her by stuffing a small towel into her mouth. This being an Asian Cat III, about halfway through the rape, our lass morphs from very non-consensual rape victim to very consensual rape participant.  Afterwards, the girl goes from the psychic's biggest critic in the home to their biggest supporter.

I suppose the dude has some mad sex skills.

That's it for the clip, but later in the film Hitomi's character is bound upright (But not gagged, which is why I didn't clip it) and simultaneously double-raped by a dead guy in the front (Yep, that's what I said) and by the sister raper dude in the back portal, if you get my meaning. Later, when she wakes up, the people in the TV (Yep, that's what I said) comment that "Her butt must hurt".

Crude? You bet. Funny? You bet! Made me LOL.

Seriously, I would love to watch this film with some Feminazi type, just to see her reactions. This one is as non-pc as it gets. 


Crazy Lips 2000 Clip




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Now That Selena Has Gotten Her DiD Cherry Popped, Will Miley Be Next?

Fake! (The gag) The boobies are real.

On a purely technical basis, Miley Cyrus already has a couple of minor (Heavy emphasis on the word "minor") scenes. One a hinky dink online clip where she half-ass tapes her own mouth for a brief time, and the other where she's tied and gagged (Supposedly. You can't even tell it's Miley as her face is covered almost entirely) with a feather boa.

In my opinion, both of these instances royally suck stinky cheese, and should not in any way count as DiD scenes.

Christmas Present? This will do fine, thanks.

There is reason for hope, however, as she has a film coming out soon called "SO UNDERCOVER".

The plot is this: "A tough, street-smart private eye is hired by the FBI to go undercover in a college sorority." 

Well that seems like a perfectly logical plot to me. I'm sure the world is filled with teenage hotties who happen to be street-wise private investigators.   


No? Look, it's a chance to see a very nicely filled-out-in-all-the-right-places Miley Cyrus potentially bound and gagged, so just go with it, okay? Now admittedly, this plot isn't quite on the level of say, "Miley is kidnapped and held hostage by a sexually deviant bondage fetishist." but it's not bad, and it certainly has more potential than the plot for Selena's Monte Carlo.    

Here are a few more shots of Miley, just in case the one above didn't wet your appetite enough.

This Girl Has Some Fine Legs...

And The Rest Ain't Bad Either!

Retro Look Back - The Saga Of The Victims

In the early 70's, comic books were incredibly popular, and, even more importantly, still relatively inexpensive.

They also had something called the "Comic Code Authority" that was on the front of every issue and performed the same task the Hayes Code did for films, making them "safe" for young children to view.

As a way to circumvent the code (But mainly as another way to make money. Thank God for unrestrained capitalism) several publishers began printing large format, B&W comic magazines. These were very risque for the time, featuring a lot of exposed (Most of it partially, but on rare occasions full frontal) female flesh, plenty of accelerated violence and gore, and even a curse word here and there. Tame for today, this was all heady stuff for a teenage or preteen kid of that era. Like me for example.

Warren Publishing (Vampirella) was the big dog in this format, but others quickly got in for a piece of the pie, even Marvel Comics (They did a B&W Punisher as well as some very good Conan stuff), including a company called Skywald Publishing. 

Skywald had short life span, beginning at the end of 1970 and ceasing business at the beginning of `75. Basically, four years. They had a number of titles, mostly horror, like "Psycho" and "Nightmare", and some non-horror, like "Hell-Rider". Personally, I wasn't all that much for those kinds of mags. I mean, I got Vampirella because, well hell, I was a teenage boy. You know why I got that magazine.

The others? Not unless there was another reason to buy them. That reason suddenly came up one hot afternoon in the summer of `74 when I visited the local convenience store to buy an Icee (Big time item back then. Every kid drank `em. Great for giving yourself a "icee headache". Yeah, we were idiots.)

Wandering over to the magazine stand (Always good for checking out the latest detective mag covers!) there was SCREAM #8. Big whoop, I thought, but still looked through it.

Wha... wha... what? Hoo wee!

Two hot (really hot) babes bound and gagged!

 
You should have seen me trying to act all nonchalant as I purchased that mag, while inside I'm just about exploding. Taken in context with the time and my age, this find was akin to seeing a HD vid clip of Britney Spears (Circa 2000) strictly tied and cleave-gagged in a lengthy scene.

The story in question was called "The Saga Of The Victims". It featured a busty blonde named "Anne" and a hot black chick named "Josie". They're dressed in what was cutting edge fashion for that era, low cut tops, no bra's, mini-shirts, and boots. The girls are kidnapped one night and the saga begins as they're put in one dangerous situation after another, barely surviving, and then find themselves in the next peril.
 
 

In SCREAM #8, they're cast out in a calm sea floating along in a giant Pterodactyl nest (Uh, just go with it, okay?) when they see a ship, which they paddle over to and climb aboard. This is no modern vessel; instead it's a old sailing ship, which of course is manned by ghoulish, cutthroat pirates. 

They bind and gag our spunky heroines and make them walk the plank that way. Why gag two female captives when you're out in the middle of an empty sea? My response is, why not?  But who knows? I'm just glad they did.

The better question is, why immediately kill them rather than ravish the beauties right there on the spot?


Because this is a comic book. A mature comic magazine perhaps, but a comic nonetheless, and in 1974 comic babes did not have to suffer the indignity of rape. Death? Murder? Dismemberment? Oh yeah. For sure, no doubt. But rape? Well that's just wrong my friend! 

Anne and Josie, both "mmphing" along the way, are driven out onto the plank for a certain doom. Not so fast, as a giant whirlpool suddenly springs up (Just go with it, okay?), throwing our damsels into the water and sinking the ship. Bound as they are, a nasty drowning seems inevitable, but amazingly, the babes are cast onto a large piece of the deck that's broken loose. What luck, huh? Still tied and gagged, Anne manages to cut her ropes on a conveniently placed sharp nail and free Josie. Incredibly, through all this, their tops, barely holding on as it is, manage to remain strategically in place, showing mucho cleavage, but not the slightest hint of nipple.

Crisis averted, for a few minutes anyway until a giant squid comes along and attacks. (Just go with it, okay?)

Sheesh, will these babes ever catch a real break?

The art, by "Suso" is excellent, with very realistic looking females. The rope-work is solid and the gags are very well done. Overall, just a great, great comic scene. One of the best of all time, IMO.

I managed to locate the complete "Saga" story, which originally ran for several issues and was never actually completed.  Our victims "break" finally came when the magazine was cancelled abruptly at the end of `74.

You can download it here:

The Complete Saga Of The Victims


NOTE: This is a cbr file, which requires a reader to view properly. There are several free ones out there to choose from, but I strongly recommend COMICAL.





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